Black Feathers 1: Welcome to Black Feathers!

In this episode, co-hosts Crystal Hernandez, Psy.D., MBA, and Shauna Humphries, MS, LPC, will welcome listeners to Black Feathers Podcast.  In this podcast we will discuss disability-related topics of interest to Tribal communities through data, storytelling, and innovative content. Crystal and Shauna will share their own families stories with disability and how that motivated them to improve family access to resources and remove barriers for all.  Thank you for joining us and remember together, we are stronger and it is the roots that bind us and that none of us walk alone.

Transcript

Crystal Hernandez: 0:00

Welcome to black feathers podcast, a true and honest conversation about disabilities for all. I'm your host, Dr. Crystal Hernandez from the Cherokee Nation,

Shauna Humphreys: 0:09

and I am Shauna Humphreys from Choctaw Nation.

Crystal Hernandez: 0:15

Chief Joseph Hinmatóowyalahtq̓it first spoke of equity, dignity, and rights for all more than 140 years ago, we are still striving for this very thing today. [flute music] Treat all men alike. Give them all the same law, give them all an even chance to live and grow. All men were made by the same great spirit chief. They are all brothers. The earth is the mother of all people, and all people should have equal rights upon it. Let them be free man, free to travel, free to stop, free to work, free to trade, free to think and talk and act for myself. Throughout this podcast, we will bring forth critical content on a variety of disability topics within our tribal nations, including pivotal stories and resources, highlighting the uniqueness and solidarity of our journeys. The hope is that we can lean in on one another, realizing we never walk alone, and the beauty of our stories hold power and allow space for others to share their story. May each of our journeys be like a pebble in the ocean, and united create the tidal wave of change. In 2019, the State of the States in Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities project of national significance asked to partner with an array of tribal members to understand the journey of people within tribal nations. The genesis of Black Feathers emerged from these conversations. I am so incredibly proud and honored to have served on this project and continue to serve the state of the states today. When I started my family's disability journey, I never imagined it would be one with so many obstacles, twists and turns and in some instances, full blown barricades. It was however, also one of resilience, growth, community and humility. The presence of others with like hearts and minds, unimaginable beauty and strength truly changed my life. Everyone needs a community, a place where they can put down their guard and remove the armor. A place where they can be their authentic self, being embraced and celebrated in their truest form, is the best and loudest symbol of love. The concept of disability within tribal nations has no exact translation to the Western world, and instead takes on meaning that embraces strengths and a sense of belonging. The gaps between service, supports and needs is large in the general community, and even larger within specific subsets of disability. Within tribal nations, it is no different and often amplified by systems and services that were created without care or inclusion of the very people and nations they were intended to serve. Our people need their voices amplified and heard to be included in the truest sense of the word in crafting systems of support and care, that have equity and dignity that are entrenched in honor, and that embody customs, beliefs and practices central to our very existence. [flute music]

Shauna Humphreys: 3:51

All right, a little story to how I got to be on this podcast with Dr. Hernandez. First of all, it's an honor to be here and to represent Choctaw Nation. years ago back in, I guess, the 1980s there was not a lot of words for disability. I had a stepdad that had a brother, so I guess a step uncle. And they described it as having water spot on the brain. And although he was grown, he had the development of a seven or eight year old and was also speech impaired. So at a very young age, I remember learning basic sign language to communicate with him and ended up using that skill like a few times within the community. Fast forward and as I'm going to college, I started out as an accounting major, and then switch to Rehabilitation Science, which is the bachelors level of the CRC the Certified Rehabilitation counselors. There I learned about a variety of disabilities and skills and how to help individuals truly focus on their strengths. I remember doing a wheelchair project when I was in obtaining my Bachelor's, and I remember going to Walmart In the wheelchair and not very many people looking you in the eye, or even holding the door open for you or not knowing what to say to you really opened my eyes to some of the stigma that people with disabilities face. And then I continue to get older and start working for my tribe, I realized there's not enough information on Native Americans with disabilities, there's not enough voice. It's very prevalent with Native Americans. But yet there's just not enough information or data. And now as LPC, a licensed professional counselor, and personally, I also have a half brother and nephew that are on the autism spectrum. The Native American views seem to be different on those with disabilities, there seems to be less stigma, and they make room for the difference. The language is also there's no equivalent for a word for handicapped or disabled. The language often just explains the difference, but never in a negative way. So for example, to be deaf is haks obish isa which haksobish is ears, and this is all in Choctaw, and isa means stop. So like ears stop. And then blind is nishkin isa, which nishkin is eyes and isa is stopped.

Crystal Hernandez: 6:28

So my family's disability journey started. About six years ago, my youngest child started displaying really early on some signs and symptoms that made me believe that he needed further evaluation and screening related to a developmental disability, I should probably say that I'm also a trained psychologist. However, at the time, the only pediatric population that I was working with were those that were victimized, or that were perpetrators of offenses. So I had very little training on Developmental Disabilities from my graduate program, and any subsequent training. And so as a mom, I started noticing differences in the way that he attended or didn't attend to his name to noises, I noticed that there were differences in the way that he would feed his tongue movement, I noticed that there were a little different ways that he would move his toes, and it and just some some things like that. And knowing what I knew, which was very little at the time in terms of developmental psychology. I talked to his pediatrician. He was about 14 months at the time or so. And at that time, pediatricians were really telling me, he's he every child's different. He's your third, you can't really gauge them off of the other two. And really wanted me to just wait, just wait. He's a boy. A month or two passed, I continue to advocate for a screening. And I have to say, screenings are recommended by American Academy of Pediatrics. He continued to push me off. And I continue to advocate. It came to the point of me basically not allowing for no not allowing for a just wait any longer. I requested the screening. He finally did the screening. He was about 17 months old. And he recommended at that point based off the screening content that he was displaying some developmental disability indicators, made a referral to a pediatric psychologist who specialized in developmental disabilities and intellectual disabilities. Just shy of two years old. We went in for that evaluation that felt like an eternity to come. And I have to say again, as a psychologist sitting in that room, the appointment lasted less than 45 minutes, I noticed that there were an array of psychological tests within the bookshelf in the bags. I noticed that there was a lot of just questionnaires and surveys on the desk, but none of them were used. She asked me a few questions about his development, his play, and my pregnancy. Asked for him to engage with a dump truck and a puzzle piece. And after that stated that we were done. I at that point asked why none of the instrumentation was deployed. And she was shocked and surprised that I knew what the instruments were. So that told me that she did not read my file, she did not understand that I was a psychologist a couple blocks away. Yes, not working with that same population in the same way. But having enough knowledge and information to know that this was inappropriate. I immediately walked out, requested to speak to the supervisor expressed my frustration and asked for a reevaluation. While we were waiting for the reevaluation, I did get the initial evaluation back. She had diagnosed him with expressive and receptive language delays, and repetitive motion disorder. For his pacing and his tiptoe walking. I was completely appalled, frustrated, and also had a moment where I sat there and said, If I was treated this way, my child was treated this way, knowing what I know. Now, what does the average person treated? Like? How many times are we getting it wrong? And how many times are people left without a voice? Because you don't know what you don't know. And sometimes, we're, we're supposed to be quiet, we're supposed to be small. And we're not supposed to make waves when somebody is the professional in the room. So it was that moment that I realized that I needed to do everything in my power to change the way that people were treated with disabilities, people were treated, that went through evaluation process that that had their rights and their dignity stripped, it was that moment that I realized that was my path forward, is to help other parents and caregivers, to be a mentor, to to work with professionals, and help them develop the skill to hear and to lean in and to learn and to open up and realize that sometimes we need to grow. My son, my son's second evaluation did come back to diagnosed with autism spectrum. So we started our autism journey. That way, and it was a bumpy start. But it's going and growing and teaching me so many things, about life, about myself, about humanity, and certainly about being a professional. [drumming music] So, you know, when we talk about disabilities, and we talk about our tribal nations, and services and in supports and different things like that, Shauna, it's just how often do we see these massive, you know, vacant spaces of information, or even the ability to say that we need more.

Shauna Humphreys: 13:18

Kind of like when your story you're talking about how, you know, you go in, and they're like, Oh, well, it's a boy, or Well, that's what explains the difference. It's almost like it's just not really wanting to be faced sometimes to in our tribal nation seem to have less of a voice. Because, you know, a lot of times our pediatricians are not Native American themselves. And so it really is there's, there's some gaps that need to be filled in, we need to be that voice to help all those in need.

Crystal Hernandez: 13:47

You know, a lot of times we talked about awareness and awareness and awareness. And I know, you know, in the groups that this disability groups that I'm affiliated with, and part of, yes, awareness is key and critical, because a lot of groups and people still aren't aware that it's really about initiation and action at this point, and trying to create opportunities for groups and people to be heard, to have gaps filled to, to really be included and have that true sense of equity that, you know, is beyond just, you know, this, this word that gets tossed around, you know, and working in mental health space and working in social services and, and just spaces that touch humans. Oftentimes in our tribal nations, the things that we do that are so critical and vital, don't fit the mold that Western society and the governing bodies really want us to have and do. And I think it's a huge missed opportunity to truly have an embrace, things that work and things that can work. work and, and bring hope and, and really are culturally rooted and dignified.

Shauna Humphreys: 15:08

Yes, I agree, you know, Native American culture, we're very collective culture. So it's not individual, you know, like Western society, you know, we stay together as a community and often have intergenerational families like staying in a household together. And as you know, on the mental health realm, that is, you know, that's a protective factor for a lot of different arenas is having that family support. And so like tapping into that, in our storytelling, and our way of life, healing, mind, body, and soul, kind of that whole connection is huge. And we do see a difference here, it's like mind is separate in the western society, mind is separate than the physical side, and then the spiritual side, you know, it may or may not even be considered, whereas Native Americans, all three is what makes a person whole.

Crystal Hernandez: 16:00

Right? It's interesting that you mentioned storytelling, storytelling is going to be one of the main components of this podcast, you know, and through storytelling and listening, we gain new perspectives and understanding of the world around us. We challenge and expand our own understanding by exploring how others see and know their world. By sharing and listening to each other stories, we get a little bit closer to what's actual, what's real, what's true. You know, and within our nation's, we see it as a primary means to pass down knowledge. And, and we give space and honor to tradition, and to people that were vital and critical within our lives and the lives that follow. And so I'm so happy that you mentioned storytelling, because I really wanted to emphasize the significance of that on our people.

Shauna Humphreys: 16:54

Yes, I agree. And, you know, in storytelling takes on many forms, like, we think storytelling is like, you know, talking and telling our stories, like we just did, but you know, Native American culture, it's also like the Act of, you know, doing our dance and our song, and things like that, but it is carrying our traditions and also a way to teach in, like you said, new perspectives. So you're teaching a new perspective from someone, or there's usually a moral to a story that we're trying to pass down to our children. And so yes, it's very, very huge component in Native American cultures, in a way to carry that history and to bring light to subjects that may not have received light before.

Crystal Hernandez: 17:39

Absolutely. And we, with storytelling, and with honor with with kind of the past on of what we're talking about, throughout this podcast, and every episode, I would imagine, we can never talk enough about the impact of historical trauma, you know, the, the collective emotional wounding that transcends across generations, for our people, you know, it goes on to, you know, folks that aren't even born yet, right? When we're talking about the loss of life and the loss of land, loss of population, the loss of culture, language, traditions, you know, and resources even, and how impactful that is on everything that we do from the way that we learn and love and, and engage the trust the way that we parent, the way that we work and the career paths we choose. You know, it's all entrenched in this historical trauma. But also, with that, there's the hope and the healing that comes from us. We are such resilient people that can and do often step forward and work together and like you said, come together in ways that are so powerful.

Shauna Humphreys: 19:02

Yes, and I often say, you know, our ancestors chose to walk that trail to give us a better life versus staying and possibly being, you know, completely killed off, you know, for lack of a better, better term, they chose to, that was their hope to move to the new land, that way, we all had a chance to live and to grow, and to look back and see like how far our tribes have came, you know, and then, you know, even looking at, at us, you know, like we're symbols of that resiliency and that hope that they had for us for future and so, it's up to us to carry it on.

Crystal Hernandez: 19:40

Throughout the State of the States in Intellectual Developmental Disability conversations. And this podcast idea, how can we reach people what is what is not being done? You know, in the work that I do, publicly and privately, it's, I've always asked why is there no where it Where there's a collective resource for all the things that we talk about, whether it's its substance use, whether it's mental health, whether it's intellectual, and developmental disabilities, whether it's physical disabilities, there's no collective spaces for ongoing tribal resource for tribal nations, for our community, for our members, there's just subsets and pockets and a document here and there. And so we were trying to we were, we were thinking about how can we come together in a way that's unique. And so from that the podcast, and so after we started talking about it, I was really thinking about things that I've seen talking to so many people in so many different states. You know, what, what this all was for them, how it was so meaningful for them to be able to share, to be able to lean in to be able to come together. And it was really about that journey, and that wholeness and that togetherness, and and from that it was you know, you see the feathers on your walks, and you and you know that you're not alone, and you know that somebody's with you. For me personally, when I see them, I constantly think of my grandma, and, and how she's with me, and I know she's with me. And everything that I do, because of her through her with her, even though she's no longer physically with me. [flute music]

Shauna Humphreys: 21:39

To provide a description of our black feathers podcast logo, it's a circular logo, when it has two feathers, following the circle, the colors of the feathers are black and red, with a turquoise background. This symbolizes a lot of things.

Crystal Hernandez: 21:57

And so coming together, looking at how to design a logo, we were so wonderfully lucky to have a disabled artist with magical skills, take this meaning in these stories, and really come up with a concept that embodied everything that we were describing, you know, we're talking about harmony, we were talking about the journey, talking about not being alone, and having those subtle reminders that we're not alone, but then also weaving through the warrior. And the fact that we're resilient, and we will fight and we will stand up and stand with and push forward. And so taking all of that content, and really designing this logo in such a powerful and meaningful way. was fantastic. And I'm so proud. Yes.

Shauna Humphreys: 22:53

Same, I'm very proud of that logo. And how it all came about was just beautiful. Very beautiful. You know how they found the artist. It's a passion of the artists and everything that is symbolizes. This, this logo is something I'm also very proud of

Crystal Hernandez: 23:13

even having the website. You know, after we just we discussed having this podcast, we discussed having this podcast and what that intended audience would be and what that intended meaning would be. And immediately, we thought about the gap that I talked about. There is no collective resource place that has ongoing up to date, easily accessible resource and content. And we wanted that website tied to this podcast, so that we can direct folks over and they're able to look and obtain and see but we're also able to use and engage in meaningful ways with them collect information that would really help drive the decisions of our partners and our stakeholders and our funders about the decisions they make when setting up funding opportunities or supporting different projects and programs throughout the tribal nations. And it's an amazing opportunity to be able to have your voice heard your story told your information, really used in meaningful ways that will help you your families, your communities, and our people[flute music] So mother sing me a song that will ease my pain, mend broken bones, bring wholeness again. Catch my babies when they are born. sing my song, teach me how to mourn. Show me the medicine of the healing herbs, the value of spirit, the way I can serve. Mother heal my heart so that I can see the gifts of yours that can live through me. Join us next month for episode are two of Black Feathers podcast. We will be discussing the concepts of mental health, mental wellness and mental illness. So Black Feathers podcast is a podcast that will occur on a monthly basis. We hope that you will listen subscribe and follow us on social media. Thank you to Cherokee National Treasure Tommy Wildcat for the use of your flute music on this podcast.

Shauna Humphreys: 25:23

I want to thank Lucas Fraiser and tha boyz for letting us use their drumming music. Please subscribe to Black Feathers podcast. You can find us wherever podcasts are found.

Crystal Hernandez: 25:32

We would love to hear from you and invite you to submit your stories and questions. Until next time.

Shauna Humphreys: 25:38

Thank you for joining us on this month's journey. Remember, none of us walk this alone. Together. We are stronger and it is the roots that bind us. Follow us on blackfeathers.org